The 7 Biggest Factors That Ruin People’s Lives ( GREAT WISDOM)

Photo by Stefan Spassov on Unsplash
After years of looking at the top CEO’s, learning from them and coaching many CEOs and hundreds of individuals myself, 7 main mistakes seem to repeat across the board:

1. They Do Not Dream Big Enough. Most goals are tiny goals that do not excite the one planning the goal. The whole world is telling us we need to have “realistic” goals without even knowing what we are capable of and we just follow that advice blindly, limiting ourselves before we even start.

Your dreams should excite you. They should be things that excite you so much you tingle with excitement every time you think about it. It doesn’t matter if it is achievable or not, the only thing that matters is that it is so big you cannot help but to work towards it.

Read also: What finally motivated me to change my life

Small goals only do 2 things:

They leave you uninspired after you achieve your goal because it wasn’t what you wanted to begin with.
They limit you in what you believe you can do.
Have a goal so big others will shake their heads, tell you it is unrealistic and will think you have a god-complex for only thinking about it. Let them be the ones that are stuck in the “realistic” world they imagine, whilst you actually test those limits with all you’ve got.

2. They Expect To Reach Their Goals Too Fast And Give Up Too Quickly. No one expects it to take a long time. In today’s world of fast internet, instant information and immediate rewards we all want things to go FAST!

We want food delivered in 30 minutes, want any product to be delivered within a day of clicking the button, and want our internet, TV shows and movies to be instantly available.

This is why so many people quit! It only needs to take 1 week longer than we expect it to and we will want to quit, saying it isn’t worth it anymore. Look at any New Year’s Resolution and you will see that this is true. Losing 10lbs is easy at first, but after a month of exercising and realizing you still have only lost 2lbs it isn’t worth it anymore.

Everything that is worth it will take its time, but it will also not matter how long it takes because it is worth it.

3. They Do Not Take Responsibility For Their Lives. It is unbelievably easy to make excuses and to blame others. If it isn’t your fault then you couldn’t change it, meaning that you are but a victim of the world around you and you will not have to put in any work.

The truth is: Living the life of your dreams is hard. If it were to just fall in your lap one day no one would do anything and everyone would have it.

A lack of responsibility causes you to become hopeless with every single negative event. Nothing is in your control, meaning every time something bad happens you are helpless and will just sit in the corner and cry.

Take responsibility for the way you feel, where you are in life and where you want to end up. It is better to believe everything is in your power than to believe nothing is. But, as with most things, a balance is still best!

4. They Do Not Believe In Their Own Power. People that end up on the street believe that, even if it is their responsibility, they couldn’t change it. “I am not strong enough/smart enough/I am too lazy/procrastinate too much/That is just the way I am.”

All of these limiting thoughts are nothing more than thoughts that hold no truth but will ruin your life faster than anything else. Learned helplessness is the biggest reason for depression, and much more common than even 20 years ago.

Believe that you can do it, even if you have no idea how. Believe you will figure it out and do something about it and you will gain control back of your life.

5. They Undercommit. Most people have a very skewed idea about the work/reward ratio of the world. In fact, most people believe it takes half the amount of work it actually will take to reach a certain goal. It’s not surprising that those people are the ones that end up depressed because nothing they do works out.

Real commitment starts when you say that you will do it no matter how long it will take. Time should not even be a factor in the things you want to do. If you can change your attitude into a “whatever it takes” attitude, you will never run into the issue of being depressed for not getting what you want, because you will always get it or always be on your way towards it.

6. They Stay With The Wrong People. Friends come and go, yet we all want to hold on so tightly to our current friends that we do not even begin to realize how negative most of them are, mostly because anything is better than being alone, right?

Even if that were to be true, that does not excuse you staying with the same negative people that only drag you down. In the end you will model all the people around you according to how much time you spend with them. That is why you are so much like your best friend and why couples become more similar as time goes on.

You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with, and if you want to improve, grow, and get your life to equal that of your dreams, then you need to find the people that will turn you into the person deserving of that life.

Read also: 7 signs you are mentally well

7. They Believe Change Is Area-Specific. Every change will change everything. You cannot expect to get a higher paying job when you still play video games for 8 hours a day and still order pizza every other day.

Right now, you have exactly what you deserve in life. You get exactly what you put into it. If you want to get a better life, then you have to change everything. Stop trying to find the specific reasons to change and focus instead on becoming the person that will naturally have the life you want.

It is not about getting the job, money or partner, but instead about becoming the person deserving of that job, that kind of money and such an amazing partner. When you realize this you will change all areas of your life, not just one.

CONTRIBUTED BY Lukas Schwekendiek

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