🌼8 signs that you’re actually a very difficult person, according to psychology



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We all like to think we’re easy to get along with, right? But sometimes, our actions might send a different message.

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The tricky part is, we’re not always aware of how we come across to others. And let’s be honest, it can be a bit of a shocker to realize that you might actually be a tough cookie to deal with.

But don’t worry. Psychology has got your back. It has identified some key signs that may suggest you’re more of a handful than you think.

Ready for some self-reflection? Here are eight signs that you might be a difficult person, according to psychology, and don’t worry, we’ll navigate this together.

Read also: 8 body language trick to help you gain confidence 

1) You’re always right

Ever heard the phrase, “It’s my way or the highway”? If that resonates with you, then you might be more difficult than you think.

Psychology tells us that people who are inflexible and insist on always being right can be pretty hard to deal with.

We all have opinions, sure. But the key is to understand that your way isn’t necessarily the only or the right way. It’s about being open to other perspectives, and willing to admit when you’re wrong.

The inability to do so can make you seem unapproachable, stubborn, and yes, difficult. So take a step back and question – are you always insisting on having the last word?

2) You struggle to accept criticism

Ah, criticism. It can be tough to take, can’t it? I remember once when I was working on a big project at work. I’d poured my heart and soul into it and was pretty proud of what I’d achieved.

But when my boss called me in for a review, she had some constructive feedback. Instead of taking it on board, I found myself becoming defensive and justifying my decisions. It was an eye-opening moment for me.

Psychology suggests that if you find yourself getting defensive or upset when someone gives you feedback, then you might be a difficult person to deal with.

Accepting criticism graciously isn’t always easy, but it’s a crucial part of personal growth. If we can’t accept feedback, how can we improve? So next time someone offers you advice or feedback, try to see it as an opportunity for growth rather than an attack.

3) You’re a conversation hog

Did you know that on average, people spend 60% of conversations talking about themselves? This figure jumps to a whopping 80% when communicating via social media. And while it’s natural to talk about our experiences and interests, dominating conversations can be a sign of being difficult.

If you find yourself consistently steering conversations back to yourself and your experiences, it might be time for a little self-reflection.

Remember, communication is a two-way street. It’s about listening as well as talking. If you’re always the one doing the talking, it can make others feel unheard and undervalued. So next time you’re in a conversation, try to catch yourself if you start to hog the limelight.

Read also: 7 laws that will put you ahead of 97% of the people 

4) Empathy isn’t your strong suit

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s a crucial social skill that helps us form meaningful relationships. But if you find it hard to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, then you might be harder to get along with than you think.

A lack of empathy can make others feel like their feelings and experiences are being dismissed or ignored. It can also lead to misunderstandings and conflict.

So, if you often find yourself struggling to understand why people feel the way they do, or if you tend to dismiss other people’s feelings as overreactions, it might be a sign that you’re a difficult person.

Remember, empathy doesn’t mean you have to agree with someone or change your own perspective. It’s about recognizing and validating their feelings, even if they’re different from your own.

5) You’re not a fan of change

Change is a part of life. It’s how we grow, evolve, and learn. But if the thought of change sends you into a tailspin, it could be a sign that you’re a difficult person to be around.

Being resistant to change can cause tension in relationships and can even hold you back in life. It can make you seem rigid, inflexible, and can limit your opportunities.

Embracing change isn’t always easy. It can be scary and uncomfortable. But it’s also where the magic happens. It’s where we learn new things about ourselves and the world around us.

So if the idea of change makes you uncomfortable, it may be time to push past your comfort zone. You might discover that the other side is more beautiful than you ever imagined.

6) You hold grudges

There was a time when I held onto a grudge for years. A friend had hurt me deeply, and I just couldn’t let it go. Every time I saw them, that old wound would open up again, and it was like reliving the pain all over again.

Holding grudges, as I learned, can make you a difficult person to be around. It can prevent you from moving forward and can keep you stuck in the past. Plus, it puts a strain on your relationships.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting what happened or letting someone off the hook. It’s more about freeing yourself from the burden of resentment and anger. It’s about choosing to let go and move forward, for your own peace of mind.

So if you find yourself holding onto grudges, it might be worth considering whether they’re serving you or holding you back.

7) Your mood swings are unpredictable

We all have our off days. But if your moods are constantly swinging from one extreme to another, it can be hard for those around you to keep up.

Unpredictable mood swings can make interactions with you feel like walking on eggshells. People may find themselves constantly trying to appease you or avoid setting you off, which can be exhausting.

Remember, it’s normal to experience a range of emotions. But when they start affecting your relationships and interactions with others, it might be a sign that you’re a difficult person.

If you recognize this in yourself, it could be worth taking some time to explore what’s causing these mood swings and finding healthier ways to manage your emotions.

8) You don’t respect boundaries

Boundaries are crucial for healthy relationships. They help us to understand where we end and another person begins. If you find yourself frequently overstepping or ignoring other people’s boundaries, it’s a strong indication that you might be a difficult person.

Respecting boundaries means acknowledging and honoring the personal limits others set. It’s about understanding that just because you’re comfortable with something, doesn’t mean everyone else is.

If you often find yourself pushing people’s boundaries, it might be time to take a step back and reassess. Remember, respect for others is a fundamental part of being easy to get along with.

Read also: 10 signs your mind is sharper than the average person according to psychology 

Final thoughts: It’s about personal growth

At the heart of psychology lies the understanding that our behaviors and attitudes are deeply intertwined with our mental processes.

If you’ve identified with some of these signs, it might be a wake-up call for introspection. Remember, acknowledging our weaknesses is not a sign of defeat, but rather a step towards personal growth.

Carl Jung, a pioneer in psychology, once said, “The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.” Yet, it’s in this acceptance that we find the courage to change and grow.

So if you find that you’re a difficult person, don’t despair. Instead, view it as an opportunity for self-improvement. The journey towards becoming an easier person to deal with starts with self-awareness and ends with embracing change.

After all, we are all works in progress.


Contributed by Eliza Hartley

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