Build massive self-respect by simply accepting them.

Did you ever feel like you’re afraid to take your next step because you could make a mistake? As if you’re trying to strive for perfectionism all the time?

Or did you ever think of giving up once for all because you feel unsure whether you can handle the responsibility? As if your goals and tasks frequently overwhelm you? Well, you’re not alone.

Humans fear change and seek comfort instinctively. According to Gustavo Razzetti, author of Stretch for Change, we fear change because we can’t anticipate the outcome. He says:

The paradox is that although we reject uncertainty, we have the skills to change and evolve. Fear is an emotion that gets in the way — we lose clarity about our potential.

You can overcome the fear of unleashing your full potential by changing your mentality.

Read also: 5 signs you are taking your life to the next level

It might be difficult, but by embracing these three truths, you’ll find that you can reframe your attitude quickly and effectively.

Mistakes make you antifragile.

Your foremost goal isn’t to make progress, look confident, or show perfect outcomes.

To me, perfectionism is just a synonym for “avoiding mistakes.”

Who do I think I am?
What will the others think?
What if I look like a fool?
Instead of doing what you intend to do, you overthink it.

The problem with overthinking is that it slows down your pace. If you want to reach your goals, you simply can’t avoid making mistakes.

If you want to max out your potential and speed up your pace, do lots of mistakes in small harm.

The concept of antifragility is a game-changer in understanding why making mistakes is so powerful: If you put glasses in a box and shake it, the glasses will most likely shatter. You’d rather keep them in a cabinet with no tremor because they’re super fragile. Quite the opposite is true for human beings. For example, spending a month in bed leads to muscle atrophy.

Controversially, we grow under the influence of stressors up to a certain level.

In his book Antifragile, philosopher Nassim Nicholas Taleb explains this characteristic as antifragility.

I had always tried to avoid stress, pain, or mistakes. After making a mistake, I neither introspected nor exploited it. Instead, I felt embarrassed and defensive.

Stress, pain, and mistakes are invaluable new pieces of information. They add crucial awareness to understand what’s going wrong so that you can make it right.

This is why bad experiences often help people to grow. The moment they learn lessons from their mistakes, they become a little more antifragile.

If you want to make and find more mistakes, start by

putting yourself out there,
publishing and talking about your imperfect work,
embracing any feedback, even if it points to flaws or potential mistakes,
tapping into unknown territory all the time,
having a #1 goal you own 100%,
being an active learner,
showing up, even taking a break would be a suitable option,
building habits to find your mistakes, for example, retrospecting your days, weeks, months,
asking your pack for honest feedback,
having a mentor (who will find your mistakes easily),
journaling and writing about your life lessons so that you can understand their meaning and learn from them later.
Every mistake is a little life lesson that makes you more confident and puts you a mile ahead. To borrow from Nassim Nicholas Taleb in his book Antifragile:

“He who has never sinned is less reliable than he who has only sinned once. And someone who has made plenty of errors — thought never the same error more than once — is more reliable than someone who has never made any.”

Exhaustion can lead to true growth.

Intensity is a secret superpower. For any big goal, always push beyond your limits.

Your potential isn’t fixed. It is highly volatile and can be increased with intense practice.

I realized it when I trained for running marathon distances back in 2019.

Initially, I could run only a measly three miles. Since my goal was to run a marathon distance of 26.2 miles, I increased the intensity (distance and pace) step by step.

After three months of intense practice, I could run a half marathon with a distance of 13.1 miles. I sprained my right ankle in the finishing mile, which forced me to take a three-week-long break. When I started running again, my max distance was divided in half.

This is applied intensity, peaking and dropping quickly, being highly volatile.

You can’t suddenly run a marathon even with a regular practice of two miles per day.
You can’t grow muscles when you stop lifting the weights every time it gets hard.
You can’t improve your reading speed if you read a few pages once per week.
You can’t learn an original Mozart song on the piano if you practice once per week.
You can’t grow emotionally if you give up when a situation gets tough.
These statements sound harsh, but to escape the ordinary, it is a good practice to face the truth head-on, even if it hurts.

Intensity is the key. For your big goal, always try to push and extend your limits.

If you want to get stronger, do things that demand energy from you. Your energy always adjusts to the level you demand.

Always be on the verge of altering the trajectory of your results upwards. To do so, intensify your actions to become better on a regular basis.

If you ran 5 miles yesterday, run 5.1 miles today.
If you wrote 500 words yesterday, write 501 words today.
If you lifted 20 lbs yesterday, try to lift 25 lbs today.
Consistency alone isn’t the key to reach your goals. Add consistently intensifying your actions to the formula. Small, steady improvements consistently accumulate over time.

Read also: Two things I tell myself when life is beating me down

A conscious lifestyle makes you super productive.

Doing anything with intention is so effective because it ensures you live by certain success habits.

First, it ensures you’re living ambitious, which ensures direction and purpose in life.

If days aren’t lived intentionally, they just seem lost. “What did I do today?” or “This day went over pretty fast.” are symptoms of living aimlessly.

In his book Outwitting The Devil, Napoleon Hill points out that all habits can lead to drifting, except striving for a clear goal. He describes drifting and being aimless to be the worst habits one can obtain.

That’s why having goals is so powerful. They are intentional statements to commit to certain activities.

Second, it ensures you know how and when to do the right trade-offs — which you do every day.

Every day you make lots of decisions to decrease certain things and to gain something else:

When you floss in the morning, you trade some free time for healthier teeth.

When you work overtime instead of hitting the gym, you’re trading a healthy body for a work package done.

When you choose to eat quinoa and veggies instead of fast food, you’re trading enjoyment for healthy fuel.

When you yell at your significant other, you’re trading introspection and connection for quickly releasing your frustration.

When you watch TV instead of working on your book, you’re trading your dream of becoming a novelist for a distraction.

How aware you are of your trade-offs dictates how you move toward or away from where you actually want to be.

Third, it ensures you calculate with the variable “change.”

Success habits have their flip side. If you exercise them too rigidly, a week in vacation, a sudden change in your schedule, or a few forced days off is all it takes to lose momentum.

Change is the only constant in life. You need to calculate with it if you want to succeed.

That’s why planning and reviewing your days, weeks, and months on a regular basis is so powerful.

It forces you to rethink your priorities constantly. It forces you to stay fixed with your goals but flexible in the way you achieve them.

How to know you’re already living an impactful conscious lifestyle?

You have goals, and you know the most important ones.
You know what you’ll watch before you switch the TV on.
You plan and review on a daily, weekly, monthly, or even yearly basis.
You know what a certain book would teach you before you even buy it.
You say “No” more often than “Yes”; you don’t spread yourself too thin.
You have a certain set of morning and evening routines you’ve purposefully built.
You stay connected with the beginning of your journey, with love for growth, not for the achievement of an end goal.
The goal is to let as few things as possible happen to you and make as many things as possible happen on your own.

Final Thought

A conscious lifestyle is not a destination. Gaining from mistakes and obstacles doesn’t even sound appealing. These truths don’t make you a “perfect person” when you live by them once.

That’s why they are so powerful. They are attitudes. They are an ongoing practice only a few people are willing to make over a long period of time.

To maintain long-term success, these truths are a crucial part of the process.

How do you keep going when times are getting rough? Stay connected with the beginning of your journey.

Let it be your reminder of why you entered this path and why it is totally worth going through the hardship that comes with it.

Contributed by Michael Rauscher

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